“Take That” and “TVXQ”: their breakups (& reunion)… how I see & feel about them


This is another post about my old time fave boyband, Take That (read my previous post here if you wanna know more about them). What’s happened to them makes me think of what’s currently happened to my fave Korean boyband TVXQ and my fandom.


There are many things show the similarity between this group and our TVXQ:

Both of the groups have a name begun with “T” (errr… for TVXQ and Tohoshinki only tho, not their original Korean name *grin*)
Both of the groups consist of five talented guys
Both of the groups do not just sing but they are good at dancing as well
Both of the groups always give the best live performances and spectacular shows
Both of the groups know very well how to make girls go crazy
Both of the groups can act foolishly on and off stage
Both of the groups have members who play musical instruments well
Both of the groups have lead vocalist who also like composing songs
Both of the groups have a very talented member who was kinda in a shadow but outshine later and also renowned for the “Casanova” label
Both of the groups have a member who was a dancer before joining the group
Both of the groups had problems when they are on top of their career
One of the group disbanded and the other group just don’t do things together anymore
BUT… will TVXQ get back together again just like what Take That did after 15 years of split up?


While in Toho case my fave members (my hubby-to-be Jae and my boyfriend Su… and their best buddy Chun) are the ones who ‘left‘ the group (they’re officially still as TVXQ members up till now though) while for Take That my most fave member (Gary Barlow) is the one who stayed. So… what’s happened to Take That didn’t have this high impact on me as what’s happened to TVXQ… and also that their fandom is not as avid as I feel when I join this TVXQ fandom.

The reason for their ‘break-up‘ is also different. Robbie Williams first left the group in 1995 coz he had problems with drugs (the rumor has it) and coz he had internal problems with other members. A year later the group was disbanded… yet in 2006 they, minus Robbie Williams, made a come back. THIS is the time when I feel happy coz I would have a chance to see my Gary sings again on stage! Oh how I luv my Gary! (mmmm… I feel like a sista to Spongebob coz both of us really luv “Gary”… *grin* but my Gary definitely likes singing better than just ‘meow’-ing!)

After they broke up they had their solo projects. Gary Barlow composed and released albums of his owns. He also composed many songs for other singers. Robbie Williams released many albums and singles and became as success as his former group. Mark Owen released album but didn’t gain success after a couple of trying. Jason Orange and Howard Donald didn’t have many solo projects… they also didn’t have their solo albums. Jason just put more concern on his dance and breakdancing skills. While Howard was busy with his activities as dancer, DJ and also song writer.

Although TVXQ doesn’t break up… but the separate ways they take now makes me feel that they’ve already broken up. They continue doing their solo or subgroup projects. Junsu had his own solo singles and musical stage play. Yoochun and Jaejoong have played in TV dramas. The three members keep composing new songs and they formed a new group named JYJ and produced two albums so far, one Japanese mini album and one int’l album. While Changmin and Yunho both did acting in TV dramas as well and plan to release an album in near future.

When Take That disbanded, I just kinda regret the situation but I know that I didn’t have any rights against their decision… so I just try to enjoy their solo projects after that. I didn’t wait for them to be five again, even it didn’t occur on my mind at that time that they will be five again and that I should wait for them. I just thought that it’s over (the group)… and I just had to accept the fact. I just enjoy their solo projects… and back to enjoy the group’s songs once in a while. I have a simple rule that time… I follow any member who had great works and just ignore the ones whose works I don’t quite like. I don’t have any feeling as being the good fan and bad fan of them. And I didn’t stick on my bias (Gary) all the time. After I experience their solo projects, my bias moved from Gary to Robbie. I luv Gary’s ballads… but I madly deeply in luv with Robbie’s pieces, whether it’s Britpop, rock or even the swing! So, basically I had the principles to just enjoy the music or the works that I like the most. And now, when I look back at that stance of mine I feel that it’s the best decision I took… coz I never regret it at all, not till now.

Knowing what has happened to TVXQ now, I think that I should not put too much hope that they will be together again… just like what I did to Take That. Call me a pessimist, but I don’t think that TVXQ boys will be together again in near future. Why? JaeChunSu, of course, I believe will not go back to their Korean entertainment company SM. I even hope that they won’t go back there! What has happened between them and SM after the lawsuit made their relationship is at their worst. If they will go back there, I just can’t imagine how SM will treat them! *sigh* While HoMin, they chose to stay and they have their own reason… strong reason for this. Because they stay and up till now we can ‘see’ that they seem to be okay with their current situation (dunno their real feeling, tho). So if we want them to be five again maybe HoMin have to leave SM and join the three. But it’s unfair for them if they feel happier under SM. See? Unless JaeChunSu or HoMin make a drastic move and make a big sacrifice… they won’t be able to be together as five again. I really don’t wanna see them hurt again. Being together again meaning that somehow they will get hurt, it could be JaeChunSu or HoMin, depend on who will make a sacrifice. So… it’s okay for me if for the time being they just have their own separate ways as long as they’re happy with it… and God knows how I really want that they’re truly happy with this! And about they are being five again… although it’s kinda difficult in near future… but maybe they will be together again someday… five, ten, or maybe fifteen years from now. Nobody knows now…

So instead of putting too much hope and wait (in misery) I prefer to enjoy what they offer us now. And don’t force me to like all of their works. And don’t bash me coz I only like my bias’ works up till now. Although my bias in Take That is Gary, but that didn’t mean that I stuck to him only… meaning that I didn’t follow and luv everything about him only. When I knew and felt that Robbie’s songs are awesome, I followed him more. And this what I (will) do to TVXQ boys. Coz up till now JYJ has given me the pieces that I luv… so I still follow them. And maybe if later HoMin can give me works that I luv then I’ll follow them. That’s it! Yet, although there’s Robbie, but my luv for Gary is still strong here inside me and it’s kinda irreplaceable. So does what I feel for my JaeSu (especially my hubby-to-be Jae)… it will be irreplaceable… but it won’t make me close my heart for the others.

When finally Take That got back together again, though only four of them, I kinda surprised and felt very happy. Moreover when I read the news some months ago that they would be together as five again. This is the thing that I’d never imagined before. They reunite because they feel to do so… and they seem so fine with this. So, for TVXQ’s case, if they will be together again someday in the future… I’ll be very happy (IF they are happy too) coz I finally can hear them singing TVXQ songs again. But if they will not be together again… then let it be. Maybe that’s what they think and feel the best for all.


Sunday to Saturday by Take That
Taken from their 3rd album ‘Nobody Else’

credit: shaofengjp

When I saw this vid… oh my God, I just remember TVXQ too. This video… is kinda the same with Toho videos. It shows how happy and full of laughter when they are together… and how dorky the boys could be. Just like what TVXQ boys often showed us.

Seeing the success they got… and the brotherhood and love among them they showed us… never imagined that they would disband on the top of their career. Just like our TVXQ boys… never imagined that they will go their separate ways. However tight the brotherhood feeling between them… it doesn’t mean nor guarantee that they have to take the same path in their life, right? Even brothers by blood can have different kind of life each… though their feeling toward each other may still the same. Although their feeling changed… it may not make them as long life enemy. Take That members have their fights and other internal problems between them that made them broke up… yet time heals all the wound and they could be together again.

In our boys’ case… we don’t really know what has happened… we don’t really know what happens now… and we don’t really know what will happen in the future. Maybe they will be five again as Take That… maybe not. Maybe the brotherhood feeling is still there… yet maybe they become long life enemies. Who knows? I myself just wanna wait and see. ‘Wait’ in the term that I just let the time flies and not put too much hope…


Never forget by Take That
Taken from their 3rd album ‘Nobody Else’

credit: TakeThatHD

The song’s lyrics and the video just remind me of TVXQ too. They have gained their success, but…

“Been on this path of life for so long
Feel I’ve walked a thousand miles
Sometimes strolled hand in hand with love
Everybody’s been there
With danger on my mind I would stay on the line of hope
I knew I could make it
Once I knew the boundaries I looked into the clouds and saw
My face in the moonlight
Just then I realized what a fool I could be
Just cause I look so high I don’t have to see me
Finding a paradise wasn’t easy but still
There’s a road going down the other side of this hill

Never forget where you’ve come here from
Never pretend that it’s all real
Someday soon this will be someone else’s dream

Been safe from the arms of disappointment for so long
Feel each day we’ve come too far
Yet each day seems to make much more
Sure is good to be here
I understand the meaning of “I can’t explain this feeling”
Now it feels so unreal
At night I see the hand that reminds me of the stand I make
The fact of reality

Never forget where you’ve come here from
Never pretend that it’s all real
Someday soon this will be someone else’s dream

We’ve come so far and we’ve reached so high
And we’ve looked each day and night in the eye
And we’re still so young and we hope for more
But remember this
We’re not invincible, we’re not invincible – No
We’re only people, we’re only people
Hey we’re not invincible, we’re not invincible
So again I’ll tell you

Never forget where you’ve come here from
Never pretend that it’s all real
Someday soon this will be someone else’s dream”


First thing first… don’t bash JaeChunSu that they ‘forget where they’ve come from… that is SM’ and say that if not because of them suing SM then TVXQ will still be together. Reading their contract here made me really understand why they want a better work environment. It’s not because of greed.

I myself once worked in a local public accounting firm that treat their employees (especially the juniors) only as their ‘complement’. They thought (maybe they still till now) that the employees (especially the new or fresh graduate ones) could gain experiences and learned a lot being work for them thus they treat them so unfairly, especially in the remuneration and the way they ‘treat’ us. After all they (the juniors) also get the accounting & auditing (& any other) knowledge from the firm, eh? So it’s kinda like being paid for being ‘student’ there. But still it’s a job… not a school! At that time my dad said “Whattt? Just that sum of money you got? For a uni graduate?” Even his workers who are only blue collar workers graduated from junior high school received the same amount as I got! And to think that they treat the junior as the dumbest, while in fact some seniors are not smarter than us the juniors. And I couldn’t just stay there… I didn’t sue them though, I asked for better condition and I got unsatisfying answer. Once the contract was over I moved out and got a better job. Though the later company is not as well known as the previous… but I felt being more respected. Even my bosses treat us the juniors as their ‘partners’ and let us bring our ideas and listen to our opinions upon certain matters more. So I do understand very well if JaeChunSu just want a better work condition. Not just about the money they get, but the feeling of being respected is also involved. They can’t just move to other company, they’ve been tied by that very long contract. If they have to wait until the contract is over, maybe it would be too late for them… their ‘peak’ career may have already over, and it will be difficult for them to start over. So they asked for better work condition to SM and coz they didn’t get it they sued SM coz there’s no other possible way. As for HoMin, they may feel satisfy enough with what they get so they prefer to stay. Just like some friends of mine who chose to stay to work on the firm. They may think that their career will be good there, considering that they work for a kinda well known firm (company)… than to move out and not sure where to work other than their current firm (company) and whether their condition will be better than their current state. We have different belief and chose different path. The same goes for the boys… they also have different belief and chose different path.

I felt touched listening to this song years ago when Take That had their last tour. They hadn’t decided to disband at that time… and to think about it later I feel that this song is really a ‘goodbye’ song from them. They’ve already felt that they won’t be together again at that time. Their words “there’s a road going down the other side of this hill” and “someday soon this will all be someone else’s dream” just referred to me that they realized their end of journey as a group. In my opinion, this song could represent what’s happened to TVXQ these days… just for TVXQ as a whole group… not to each of its members. Although in reality TVXQ is not over yet, and the name may always remain coz SM wanna use it, but I sense that somehow TVXQ is ‘over’. They are legend so their achievements and their songs will always remain there in the history… in our mind and our heart… and never ever be forgotten. But ‘physically’, there’s no more TVXQ for me.

This Take That song is also describe well about how each members of TVXQ may feel now… although TVXQ is may be not near its ending… but their current situation is felt like it. Our boys have come so far, they have gained their success being the top in the Korean (even Asian) music industry… and they did that with lots of hard works and love together. Although they still feel that they are still young (as a group) and hope and want to do more (as a group)… yet they have to face the road that’s going down on the other side of the hill now… coz after all they are only human… after all they are not invincible.

I believe that they really are strong guys, and know for sure that’s all their dreams will not be achieved through easy path & good times only… but also have so many difficulties in the process. I believe that they have stronghold to start over again ‘individually’ (whether as smaller group such as duo or trio, or as soloist)… after all they are still young and hope for more. They will take separate path in their career… yet never give up their dreams. I hope that each of them will get succeed. They are part of the group that I love the most… so, though not equally, still all of them have that special place in me. And I will just see their efforts from now on… and see later how big they can make… and pray for them during the process…

The faith that each of them will never give up their dreams and move forward…
The faith that each of them will do and give us the best of them…
The faith that each of them will gain more success in the future…


Holding back the tears by Take That
Taken from their 3rd album ‘Nobody Else’

credit: leannesg86

This title of the song reminds me of TVXQ’s song… *sad*. When I found the news about the three members’ lawsuit I couldn’t help myself cried… the first cry I ever had in my life only for what has happened to my fave singers/artists! But life goes on… they continue on their life and I continue to live my life. Although the fandom is not the same as before… but I still stay and enjoy it to the level that I’m willing to take.

Our live have so many colorful moments… so many mixture of feelings… even twist here and there. It’s our job to handle those twisted feeling … we have to adjust the feeling we have with the situation we face … so that we can go on and stay alive.
Just like the fandom… I just have to be able to control my feeling toward this fandom of mine… and not the other way around. I should be the one who decide how should I react toward the fandom… and not being dictated by it.
It won’t be easy though… coz of the avid fandom I have here… coz of the complicated fandom I have now…
I have hopes… I have desires… I have things I want them to do… but it’s their full rights whether they want to do what I want them to do or not…
Though I want them to do this and that, I just can’t push them to do what I like… coz they have their own will… their own life… their own hope…
Let them live their life as I live my life…
I continue to live my life by enjoying the most what they offer me from now on…
Let them live their life by enjoying the most what they really like doing from now on…

“I kind of keep asking myself little questions
Like where do I go from here
I seem to keep loosing track of time and how long it’s been
Since I last had you near

Been a painful road to a door that’s closed
Been a gamble that I knew I couldn’t win
Been a lonely conversation to this photograph of you
In the mirror there’s a sing I must give in

So I’m not holding back the tears anymore
tryin’ escape the heartache, tryin’ escape emotion
No I’m not holding back the tears anymore
Yesterday’s my memory reminding me of all the time
I depended on you …”



Take That released their latest album, as a reunion album, “Progress” on November 15, 2010… just a week ago. They will also hold a UK tour next year.
Just like TVXQ, the album is being the biggest selling album in their country, and the ticket sales for the tour also caused phone line crashed because of the massive demand. The ticket sales is also being the fastest selling ticket ever.


Posted in My Fandom - Tohoshinki/DBSK/TVXQ | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

JYJ have to hold their showcases in US for FREE… (another mess?)


This is the news I got this morning, right after I woke up, about JYJ didn’t have working visa in US: *sigh*


JYJ’s P1 Visas Denied for US Performance

Members decides to pay for showcase themselves to honor their commitment to their fans in the US

11 November 2010 – JYJ has decided to go ahead and perform for their fans in the US despite being denied of their P1 visas. Cjes Management, the management company for JYJ has stated that it is of utmost importance that JYJ keeps their promise to their fans and they have been in New York since the 9th to await the decision only to be given the disappointing news.

According to US lawyers advising the team on the situation, JYJ will still be able to take stage on the condition that the performance is free and they receive no monetary benefit for the performance. Due to the fact that substantial costs has already been incurred by the promoters for production, flights, accommodations, there will still be a financial responsibility to be fulfilled which JYJ has decided to undertake this upon themselves to make the events happen.

Says Cjes Entertainment CEO, Mr Baek Chang Ju, “We are still awaiting the official reason to why their P1 visas have been denied since the band has followed every procedure required and also did their interviews accordingly. We are extremely puzzled by this matter and will continue investigations into it. For now, JYJ’s primary objective is to make sure that fans are still able to catch the showcase. Hence we have decided to step in on all costs associated with putting on the show to make sure that the events go on as planned.”

All venues have been informed on setting up FAQs on how fans can receive a refund on the tickets they bought. In addition, fans who have paid for a ticket will also receive a ticket to the free showcase. The rest of the tickets will be allocated on a first come first serve basis from Ticketmaster.

The refund process will start at 12pm on the 11th November 2010.

Updates: New York | Las Vegas (coming soon) | Los Angeles (coming soon)

source: http://www.entitledent.com/jyj/ + sharingyoochun


When I thought that there will be no more worse situation… it turns out that what I thought is wrong. *sigh*
When I thought that I won’t be sad again over the boys… it turns out that what I thought is wrong… again. *sigh*

I didn’t weep though, just got my watery eyes, so it’s not as bad as when I heard them been apart from Avex (I wrote how I felt that time here and here). Maybe also because my real life right now is not bad as before… so I just feel the sadness from the boys only. And dunno why, maybe I should thank AKP after all? I mean I initially read the ‘news’ from this site… with some doubts… but because of the news there… somehow I got prepared for the worse to come. So when I read the news in other sites, I didn’t get so shock anymore *sigh*


I disrespect the management and their PR because up till now they haven’t shown enough professionalism. The other Asian showcases, such as the ones in S’pore and Kuala Lumpur, have been poorly organized (I should thank someone who honestly told me about the real condition of the showcase in S’pore. She told me that it was kinda bad… not their performance of course, but the venue, the lack of promotional pics/banners outside the building… these kinda things *sigh*). They also made a mess in the JYJ teaser vid when they misspelled the names and when they mixed up between ‘city’ and ‘country’ names. And also about their ‘request’ to us to make letters to those US media (isn’t it their jobs to do that? The promotion?). I just feel that it’s not the same… when we write to the media by our own will and when we’re told to by them. *sigh*

And now this! The worst ever! And this time I don’t wanna say that any publicity is good publicity… it’s too bad for them! ‘Bad’ music video or ‘bad’ clothes are okay… coz it has something to do with ‘preference’… and each person has their own taste and view. But this… *sigh* It will only shows how unprofessional they are *feelin hurt inside* The people (other than us, the fans) may not care about who’s behind all of this… may not care about the reasons behind all this mess… they only see this as a mess and that’s all! I don’t want JYJ image being ruined… moreover when they are not the ones who look out for troubles. I mean, if the boys do drug (it’s only ‘IF’) so it’s them only who’s looking for troubles… but for this showcases, because it’s their management’s job and responsibility to organize the shows… then the major blame is supposed to be theirs … not the boys’! But common people don’t see (or don’t wanna see) the things in this way. They only see things on the surface… sigh*

After all this things we may shout louder to the boys to change their management… but the problem is, can they? Can they do it soon? Can they do it without any other impact related to the contract? It may not as easy as drooling when we see their pics (what a weird idiom). And I wonder… should we put all the blames on the management? All those failures incurred? *sigh*

And about ALL the failure incurred… yeah, the management failed many times when they have to handle the boys’ matters… but I don’t wanna drag about the not so good “Ayyy Girl” MV here. Yes, the MV is so lack in the CG (my view about the MV is here) but maybe it’s not entirely the management’s and/or PR’s faults. Maybe it’s the boys’ idea to have this kinda MV. Maybe the budget is not enough yet they’ve been made sure by the MV producer that the outcome will be fantastic. Who knows? We really don’t know about how far is their management’s involvement in this kinda thing… so maybe it’s better not to include the MV as one of the failure of the management. We don’t know the real story behind it, eh? It could be the failure of the management or their PR or other party or even the boys themselves… who knows?

See? The problem is I DON’T KNOW FOR SURE who I must blame for ALL the mess. Yes, the major part may go to the management coz they are the ones who have responsibility for this and they are the ones who directly involved in the organizing activities. But… what about the boys, who is the employer and the big boss… don’t they have any responsibilities for all of this mess? When someone in my office do mistakes, then the boss will also feel responsible for the employee, coz after all the employee is under his/her supervisory. Isn’t this what also happen in all places? Although it’s so hard for me to get mad at those foolish but brave young men name Jaejoong, Junsu, and Yoochun if somehow they have ‘role’ in this mess… but I think I should not put aside this possibility. I know it will be hard for them to think of so many matters, not just their singing… but this is what they should be aware if they have their own ‘company’. And also considering their family and other parties who may interfere their activities. It’s darn okay if all the people involved are the professional ones… not just because they ‘trust’ them only… coz what they want is smooth way to reach their bigger dream,eh? They must know that entertainment industry is not a place only full of flowers and joyful things (I so doubt if they don’t know about this)… it needs talent, hard work and professionalism. I have no doubt about the first two… but that last factor is what they need now! I hope they can make more carefully planned strategy about the things they wanna do…*sigh* Oh my…

What I hate the most right now is not their management and PR. Yes, they didn’t get their jobs well done but I hate the situation the most, especially the lawsuit… I wonder when will the final verdict be issued? Because when it happens, they can get away from SM and maybe get another big entertainment company to support them! So, where should I write letters to ask why it takes so very long for the district attorney/judge (or whoever it is) to come out with the final verdict?

As long as they are still under the lawsuit… then they really can’t move too much further… maybe they even have to step backward (please, I hope they don’t have to back off!). And to think that maybe there’s not any more entertainment agency willing to work with the boys since they have to face so many difficulties and that they are too afraid to go against one of the biggest entertainment company in Korea and that have so many shares and influence in the Korean entertainment industry as a whole. Poor boys *sigh* When they are no longer in SM, I hope there’s a major label willing to work with them. I so hope that many of those major labels know the potential of our boys and be certain that (though they faced some troubles in the past) they will be a huge success in the future thus will give them benefit as well. So, how can I (or we) somehow convince those major labels that the boys are talented ones and deserve to stay and shine in the entertainment industry?

I know that there are two possibilities in the final verdict (as in other matters too), the positive and negative outcome (in our point of view). We have this worry inside that somehow the verdict will be in SM’s favor. But at least we will know for certain what the boys have to do next as soon as possible. When the good thing’s resulted (oh how I want this is what will happen), they will have easier path to go and achieve their dreams. If the worse thing happens, maybe it’s time for them to start over and make a new beginning. The time when they need our supports the most so they will stay strong… and it’s time for us to be stronger too. The longer this lawsuit time… I’m afraid that more and more fans starting to loose their faith and abandon the boys *sad*. Yeah, I know that means they are not ‘loyal’ fans… but they don’t only need avid fans… they need all fans in general. The more fans and the more supports they get… the stronger they will feel. *sigh*

And please, don’t ever tell me that after all SM is better and that they should go back to SM and be five again! Oh yeah, it will be great if they can be five again… but please not under SM!!! Can’t you imagine what will they get when they’re back? I believe that SM has hatred toward them, and ‘maybe’ they will treat them badly coz the boys had made troubles to the company. Even if SM treat them kind, they won’t be able to be as creative as now… as freely as now… maybe even as happy as now (dunno though whether they are happier now *grin* but… yeah I want them to have happier life now and in the future!). The most important thing is, they have said that they want to always be real and true to who they are and what they do, and to always do their best… so let them grow up… let them soar… let them be themselves… let them be real artistes…

I always question myself… the big question… why they rush up things? Are they afraid of something that will probably happen in the future and before that thing happens they should get JYJ do all those they’re working on now ASAP? Because maybe when the things happened, JYJ will not be able to do what they’re doing now… launch album, showcases, meet more fans, hold concerts, etc. Is that so? IF there is something they afraid of… WHAT IS THAT? Gosh, I now always tell myself to not assuming things… but here I am let my mind wandering too far. I’m just so curious why they have to rush up things… anyone have valid reasons for this? And guys, can you slow it down (if you can) because when you rush up things you would not have enough time to carefully plan your doings.


They wrote this to the fans:

Dear Fans,

As you all know, we have not had it easy in this journey. It seemed as though every step of the way, it became more and more difficult to share our lives’ passion with all of you. Recently we were denied the ability to perform in the US by a rejection of our visa but – the show MUST go on.

In appreciation of all of you being the best fans in the world, we’ve decided to do the US Showcase Tour for FREE. Thank you for all of your loving support and understanding.

Can’t wait to see all of you very soon.

Jejung / Yuchun / Junsu

source: http://www.entitledent.com/jyj/


What makes me touched is the fact that they will give FREE showcase for the fans. I feel this bittersweet feeling inside… reading their words makes me feel sad yet feel proud of them at the same time. I just remember what they said “We choose honor over money and fame.”

What they do now show us how they appreciate their fans. They don’t wanna disappoint the fans any more and they realize that it’s a rare chance for the fans outside Asia to watch them live.

What they do now show us how they wanna take their responsibility when the things go wrong. They don’t just get away from the mess ‘they’ made. They are willing to take any consequences incurred.

What they do now show us how they wanna sacrifice for their dreams. They don’t let anything prevent them to become true artistes. They will walk on and keep their belief on what they want to achieve.

But… will they get broke for this? Possibly. Will they really? Maybe not really broke… DUNNO!!! I don’t know anything about their wealth… to be able to say whether they will get broke or not, but I know for sure that all these free showcases will cost a lot! I hope that they have the money to cover up all this massive expenses during their stay and shows in US. I hope (and dunno why I have this kinda slight belief) that there’s a sponsor, someone behind the curtain, who supports them so after all this ‘sponsor’ can cover up the major expenses and let only the less amount be covered by the boys themselves. But… this is only my hope *sigh* Gosh, I started assuming things again… maybe this is what I WANT TO BELIEVE coz it’s hard for me to think of the worse thing! Maybe there’s no sponsor at all and they have to cover all the costs themselves!!! And boys… please don’t involve any moneylender if there’s any shortage of fund problems… moreover if they have connection with mafia! (I think I watched too many Korean dramas that I imagine them beaten up to death if they can’t repay back the debt!) Oh my… my wandering mind! It’s just my wild imagination… and I so hope… very much hope… that IT’S NOT TRUE… not even a darn bit! Oh my… *sigh* *feel hurt inside*

Because of this possibility that they have to cover up a big amount of money, then fans try to find ways to support them. Yeah, who would not? We feel very touched with their struggle up till now. We feel very touched by their sincerity. So… yes, I will support them more! I decide myself to buy another album of them although my hubby may complain coz the album price is so expensive for us *sorry, dear*. And I also think of other ways to give them supports. I hope that the fans will unite more… and give their supports in more organized way especially for this US showcases.


Jae said on twitter

(mjjeje) So many waves are hitting. I know that the journey in front of me is so long and far away but I just can’t stop and give up. At the moment I stop, I give up on the road to becoming a grown up and hit rock bottom. Even if I just started on my journey to becoming an adult, still being young is my best weapon and with that, I want to discover the world I have never seen before. Let’s all keep our strength up! I’m always thankful!

credit: @MTVKofficial + SashiTD (on SYC comments for the hint… and the sub?)


Gosh, when I reread this through my cellphone in my office… my eyes got watery again! Oh my… *try to keep the tears from falling* What he said there really touched the deep of my heart! His determination (and I believe the two others too) to continue on his struggle to reach for his dreams is something to be proud of. It’s so wonderful that he think this way. And I know for sure, that I will always support them in any ways I can.

Please remember, guys… there are so many fans of yours who will always support you!
So… stay strong, will you?
And never give up your dreams!
If you feel sad… we will give our shoulders to cry on
If you feel so tired… we will give you strength to keep on going
If you feel any doubts… we will give you our views and assurance
If you feel any pain in heart… we will heal your pain by giving you more happy moments
If you feel loosing out your faith… we will be there to remind you that we haven’t and we will not
If you feel like to be kissed… oh here I am ready to give you one… errr many kisses *got kicked* (Okay, even in this kinda situation I can’t help my pervy mind *sigh*)


Since I listen to Take That’s songs a lot these days, so I wanna share one of their song (my fave one) here

“Reach Out”

If our arms were reaching out
If our words could only bridge the doubt
Will we lose this chance again?
Strange roads with different signs
Don’t even know where we divide
Are you my enemy or my friend?

‘Cause I don’t know you… and you don’t know me
It’s the same sun rising… we all just look to the sky
If we try… we can work it out somehow
If you don’t know me and I don’t know you
How can we be fighting… we’re all connected it’s true
Reaching out… It’s only love that pulls us through

We all grieve in different ways
If one tear could wash away the pain
We’re all free to have the faith we believe, yeah
The world sleeps at different times
With one turn your day is now my night
We all live sharing the air that we breathe

Reaching out… reaching high
Reaching out… touching you… touching me



Just reach out your heart and your feeling to JYJ…
Please give much support to the boys…
Send them your message or letter to show them your concerns…
Tell them that you will always be there for them…
Tell them to stay strong and never give up on their dreams…
You can give them your money if you want to…
As long as doesn’t hurt their pride and their trust…
Buy more of their album if you can…
Make their album’s selling as number 1 in many charts…
Take your friends to the showcase and concert…
Show your friends how JYJ are worth to be called true artistes…
Make any tribute videos for the boys saying you support them…
Make any tribute videos for other people to know better about them…
Make them as number one in every poll…
Make them as trending in twitter for many times…
Make tribute for them in the newspapers…
Make charity under their names…
Make big banner and put them in city center…
Make flashmob using their song in your city area…
And tell the people around about JYJ…
Organize fun bike wearing JYJ fans stuffs and ride around the city…
Go to hair stylists and ask them to cut or dye your hair as JYJ…
Tell them who JYJ are if they ask ‘who’…
Buy their merchandise produced by their current management…
Wear a shirt with JYJ name and pic on it when you go out…
Wear a jacket with JYJ name embroidered there…
Bring your bag with JYJ pins on it also…
Put JYJ stickers on the most visible spot on your car…
Use mug with their pics on it in the office…
Change your wallpaper to one of their pics…
Change your ringtone to one of their songs…
Hum or sing their songs where others can listen to…
Use their song when you enter a talent show…
Use their songs for projects in your school…
Use their songs when you have a party…
Play their songs in public places…
Ask for their songs on radio…
Ask for their songs on TV music channels…
Ask the DJ on the club to play their songs…
Ask the karaoke bar staff why no JYJ songs in their place…
Ask for their album in your local record store…
And ask the owner how come they don’t sell them there if you get ‘no’ answers…
Ask the people around you whether they know JYJ…
Tell them that they are good singers…
Tell them the reasons why…
Ask the related official institution why the final verdict of their lawsuit has not come out yet…
Just ask and tell and do more for the sake of the boys…
Tell the media about all your hopes and supports for the boys…
Let the foreign media know how supportive the boys’ fans are…
Let the foreign media know how much love the boys’ fans have for them…

Just make any movement to support JYJ!
Any supports you can think of…
Any positive movements will do…
Even the not so positive ones…
Even when it seems pathetic *grin… a weak grin*
It will worth more if you give direct supports to them…
the supports which effect can be felt directly by them
Shall we start from now?


My ‘Boss’ and my colleagues might think that I work very hard coz I’ve already busy with my typing since I arrived at the office at around 7.30… while the truth is I typed this! But I had to stop in the middle coz I had a meeting… and continued this at lunch time! How the boys really affect my life… even I had to put aside my works to just write how I feel about them. I also wasn’t able to concentrate well during the meeting coz my mind just took me back to the boys’ problems. And I had to find perfect moment to post this… coz I couldn’t wait till I get home… yet I didn’t make it at the office or the nearest netcafe from the office… just as usual I made it when I already arrived home and I got so #@%&* sigh*

Gosh, I luv them so much… I worry about them so much…
Please God… give them strength… and patience… and health… and happiness (from many other kinda things for the time being)


Posted in My Fandom - JYJ | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

DBSK rumors… and how I feel…


It’s about the rumor of Changmin’s been hospitalized coz of elbow/backbone injury and that Su’s made a plan or even ‘probably” made a visit to the hospital. You can read the news here


When the rumor spread among the cassies and posted on fan sites, there are many comments of the fans about this matter. I can see how they think and feel when they heard the rumor… and I can see how I feel toward this. When I read the rumor… my reaction is just “Really?”… in flat and boring tone. When I think of my first reaction, I seemingly have stepped into a new level of fandom. Is this a backward or forward one… you tell me!

I’m getting used to rumors spreading around/about the boys. Some turned out to be true… but many are not! I just prefer to wait for the official news to come out… yet not all of that rumors will get an official explanation… coz the history says: too many that left unexplained! So, for this ‘rumor’ I also don’t think there will be any.


About Changmin got injured…
So many questions roaming in my head, such as:
– How did they know that Changmin is injured?
– How come they know that it’s elbow injuries? Or the later rumor about backbone injury?
– Why has he taken to that certain hospital?
– Was there any witness who saw him went to the hospital to get a medical treatment? Any statement from the hospital staff ? (official one is maybe breaks the medical ethic coz it has to do with patient’s medrec… dunno though. Any unofficial ‘statement’ from any staffs or maybe from people there who really saw him? Just to give a hint?)
– DBSK stalkers are ‘good’ stalkers (in term of that they could trace the members activities so well), so where’s the pic of him went to, or in, hospital?
– Or is this another ‘protective’ reason why they won’t put the pic to the public? (and I kinda got tired by this ‘protective’ reason *sigh*. For me, as an international fans, I feel like I know nothing about the boys! Sometimes I feel like being lied, coz I don’t know for sure about the boys’ news/info… whether it’s true or not! I really don’t know where I should stand on… *sigh*)
– But, if Min’s really injured, is it better if fans know about it (IF he is really, indeed) so that the fans could give him more support?

If I wanna wait for an official statement, I guess I will never get it. It’s been so many times that we heard the rumors about our boys got injured, but always from rumor or from other people tweets or blogs. So… I become pessimist about this. SM will not release an official statement, coz that statement could create other rumors, such as: How he got injured? Did he fall during rehearsal? Or was there anybody who beat him up? Was that ‘anybody’ is from his company? Or did he get that injury because he’s stumble when he’s drunk? Who did he drink with? Was there a girl with him? Who was she? Etc… etc… etc… Yeah… the rumor is ‘created’ by us, the fans or the people in general, without any valid ground. So, it can be AS WILD AS WE CAN IMAGINE… and it’s dangerous!

So… where’s the proof of Changmin got injured and been hospitalized? The rumor might be true… but it’s better if it’s not. Just like many fans who has empathy about the rumor… it’s not about Junsu (plan to) visited Changmin that matters the most, but it’s about Changmin’s injury! I also hope that he got no injury… that he’s healthy. But IF he really got that, I just pray that he’ll recover soon and that he can be patient with the pain he’s experiencing.


About Su made plan to visit Changmin…
– So where can I find the valid info that he’s really intended to find ways to go to the hospital to visit Changmin?
– Maybe he just tried to find ways to the (pet) store that happens to be located not very far from the hospital?
– Back to Changmin’s rumor… maybe he’s not hospitalized there so that Su ’s searching for a certain place on the map didn’t have any relation whatsoever with Changmin, eh? Should we ask Su about his intention? Or should we ask Tigger? (we should find Dr. Doolittle first!)
– Or maybe, he even made a visit? Then, did anyone witness about this?
– Or maybe he just made a call to Changmin? Coz after all they’re ‘brothers’? Then how can we know about this? Only Min & Su who know about this, eh?!

It will be good that they still keep in contact. They are brothers… five years always together + two years more (+ their training time) maybe still have the tight bond between them (and any TVXQ members). And if the news of Junsu is true… then it’s a very good news. Yet, since I know nothing… I prefer myself to think that it’s just 50-50 probability. They maybe still contact each other (in secret)… or they maybe not. It’s just how we wanna put ourselves to believe the good probability or the bad one. How about you?


Am I being a pessimist? Mmmmm… when it comes to the fandom, I dunno why I tend to be pessimist in this kinda ‘good news’. Why? Because if the rumor is as good as it is, then I’ll be more happy. But if the rumor is not true, or that the fact is not that good, I won’t be too disappointed coz I’ve already positioned myself in that belief.


Oh my… why I so love to cite what Jae ‘says’ through his tattoo. He’s such a deep thinker… sometime! (only sometime? *grin*)

Deferto neminem…
Accuse no man…

So, don’t make assumptions coz anyway we know NOTHING about them… about the truth…


Posted in My Fandom - Tohoshinki/DBSK/TVXQ | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

My Music… ‘TAKE THAT’


few days to come to the reunion album release ~_^


Because there’s not much ‘sensational’ news about the boys these days *grin*… so I just wanna spazz about other things… not my current fandom, but my past one. Somehow the group that I’m talking about now has some resemblances with our beloved group TVXQ. I’ll tell you more about this next time. As for now, just let’s find out more about this old boyband… errrr or should we call them ‘manband’ since they’re no longer boys? *grin*

I remember my old time when I was young *cough*… I fell in luv with this bunch of young men called themselves ‘Take That’. I still wonder why they use the word ‘that’? Why not ‘this’? I mean they should use ‘this’ which is referring to themselves… that means we should take them! Or they just have to plainly called themselves ‘Take Us’… and I would gladly take them… errr, only Gary Barlow though… to my bed *grin* *got kicked*

Take That (or TT) is an English boyband, from Manchester, England (how I always luv a group from this town… such as Oasis and James *grin*). The group itself consists of Gary Barlow (main vocalist and also the songwriter and composer of many of their songs), Robbie Williams, Mark Owen, Howard Donald, and Jason Orange.

They are definitely not categorized as GOD looking guys for me. Even my most fave member, Gary Barlow, has that chubby face and a kinda… errr lil… errr very lil… overweight *grin* *got kicked* Compared to other boybands, they will get C grade on average (okay C+) while the other boybands got B or A for their looks… even straight As for TVXQ *cough* But… when it comes to music, then the music itself that is the most important to me! Although there are many other boybands with God-looking looks… but I just don’t really tempted to fangirling if they don’t have enough good songs and great vocals. I will still admire the looks tho… just like I do to… errrr, maybe I’d better not mention their names *grin*… but that’s all… I can’t call him my fave ‘singer’, just my fave best looking male *smirk*

I became their fan after their second album ‘Everything Changes’ (just like Toho… I became their fan after they released ‘Five in the Black’, their 2nd Japanese album *grin*). My most fave song from the album is ‘Another crack in my heart’ which makes me enjoying the beautiful voice of Gary… while most people like their other songs in the album better! Just like when most people choose ‘Mirotic’ as their most fave song of TVXQ in their album, I luv ‘You’re My Melody’ the most… *pout*

And this Take That… I also admire them because of the nice songs they have. I know that many of their songs are just so… pop (?) *grin*. I mean, they are just easy listening ones and not the songs that will get prize because of its beautiful complicated composition… but still I like it! Blame it on that chubby Gary and his voice!

Here I share some videos of them… so for the ones who don’t know any of their songs will understand more why I like them *grin*… and for the ones who already knew about them, it’s time to recalling back the good old days *grin*. These songs are taken from their first 3 albums and their single.


Back for good
Taken from their 3rd album ‘Nobody Else’

———————- credit: Take ThatHD

I guess that after the video shooting all of them caught cold *grin*… or not? Since they wore thick clothes? Nonetheless, I luv this! Though the theme is so darn simple, moreover if it’s compared to that JYJ’s ‘Ayyy Girl’ MV, but with that b/w image it just looks nice and… kinda sexy. The mix between dudes and showering water is dangerous! Seeing them wet just make me wet as well *cough* *grin* But… I chose to ignore that certain dudes who tried to look cool and sexy by dancing (what they think as sexy dance), or whatever it is, in the rain. If only they’re just playing cool instead, like Gary did, then I might become more tempted!
This MV makes me remember TVXQ’s ‘Shine’… though it’s much difference in theme (errr… if it’s different, why it makes me remember of our boys’ MV? *confuse*). It’s just that each one of them tried to dance as good as they can… and there’s water splashes on the vid… that what makes me remember the TVXQ’s MV. We’re able to see who’s better though… in the dance… and in the special effect as well *grin* Yeah, none of them can beat our TVXQ boys!


Another crack in my heart
Taken from their 2nd album ‘Everything Changes’

———————- credit: aoz3

I tried to search their MV for this but I couldn’t find it… so maybe there’s no official MV for this! Oh my… my most fave song of them from the album doesn’t have a MV? Too bad! It’s always happened… the MV is made for other songs that they think is cooler, while for me it’s not! It makes me remember the JYJ’s song… why ‘Ayyy Girl’ and not ‘Empty’? *sigh*


Love ain’t here anymore
Taken from their 2nd album ‘Everything Changes’

———————- credit: TakeThatVEVO

I luv this MV of them… it’s kinda simple yet beautiful. Just not too much unnecessary scenes showed… and the fact that they wear whites! I always luv people when they wear white attire… especially our boys TVXQ. I remember their ‘Begin’ MV… the first MV I know of them… the (song &) MV that made me fall in love with them. They all wear simple white clothes there… so lovingly! Then ‘Asu wa kuru kara’… one of their first songs I know… they also wear whites in the MV. And… their last Korean MV ‘Picture of you’… they also wear whites. O my… I feel so nostalgic *sigh*


Could it be Magic
Taken from their 1st album ‘Take That and Party’

———————- credit: TakeThatHD

This song is sung by Robbie Williams. Yes, once in a while the other members also have a turn to sing the group songs. The major difference between this group and TVXQ is that each member of TT doesn’t have the same chance to sing the songs. Almost all of the group songs are sung by the main vocalist Gary Barlow, since he’s also the composer of many of their songs. While in TVXQ, each member have almost the same chance to sing part of the songs in every song they sing. If TVXQ members sing solo, then it’s considered as fully solo song and not group song. The vocal harmonization in TVXQ is what I find amazing and makes me fall in luv with them. Many western boybands don’t have this kinda style and quality.
About the MV… since it’s their early MV so it’s kinda cheap *grin* *got kicked by them*. I just shook my head and giggled watching them tried hard to look sexy! They do this (what they called as) sexy moves in most of their vids, especially the up beat ones. These sexy moves are kinda errrr *grin* dunno what to call it… and it just can’t be compared with TVXQ’s sexy yet gracefully moves when they dance. And… what did Mark tried to do, exactly? Pumping moves and then pulled his shirt up with such a grin? To show us that he’s sexy? Failed! *smirk*. Well, at least we can see in this vid that they really can dance… though the dance is not an ‘organized’ one as TVXQ usually has. Each of them just dance the way they like it. Gosh, it makes me miss those TVXQ awesome dance performance. I feel like watching ‘Are you a good girl’ dance performance… mmmmm *drool over already*
Thinking of this ‘try-to-be-sexy-but-not-sexy’ vid makes me wanna share some ‘sexy’ (errrr… even sexier) music videos of them! You’ll see more of their flesh and their tempting moves. Interesting? So… maybe on my next post?


How deep is your love
Their single, originally sung by Bee Gees

———————- credit: TakeThatHD

This MV kinda remind me of Toho’s Mirotic MV… though it’s different! (once again! different… yet somehow it’s quite the same on my mind *grin*)The boys were kept as hostages by an obsessive gal. Of course, ‘Mirotic’ version is way cooler and sexier than this… coz in ‘Mirotic’ there’s someone sexy been tied on the wall *cough*… while in this TT vid the boys are just tied up in a chair. And to think of that ‘not-looked-so-tight’ tie, they should’ve been able to escape… but why didn’t they? Hmmm…
You may wonder why only four of them here? Well, I’ll explain more on my next post about this group and their resemblance with our beloved group TVXQ.




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JYJ … “Ayyy Girl…” MV


I watched the MV for more than ten times before I wrote this (and now the song keep lingering on my mind! I even often hum this song… the song that I thought as the least song I like! Gosh, it must be the visual effect… and the 10+ times listening effect as well *grin*).

************* credit: JYJ

After I watched it… I feel like making a call to the Pixar Studio and asking them to make a better version of this video. The CG for the background just doesn’t blend well with the boys… *frown*. It’s merely seen as a background… and gives the feeling that they don’t really in there. It’s like two separate pics… I dunno… that’s only what I think! It’s just like watching Star Wars in the Harrison Ford era… not the Star Wars in the Ewan McGregor era. But… maybe I should wait for the HD version… just like when I watched the LQ and this HQ (yet not really HQ) I’ve seen much of the differences *grin*. Still I luv the 3D idea… this is really cool! And can’t wait to really watch it in 3D format. Talking about 3D… why I just remember their Korean entertainment company? Well, not only them can make 3D vids, eh? *grin*

I don’t mind about the theme… even I find it very cool! Still I wonder what’s the connection between the song’s lyrics and that Olympus building got ruined? I wish, though they use the Olympus background and theme, they have to put a story which is connected to the lyrics! Some fans interpret the theme in some ways, especially about the boys’ feeling for SM… yet for people who don’t know what’s going on in JYJ’s life, then they will merely relate the vid and the song. And BTW, for some fans who complain about Su’s white halter top and Chun’s make up… *hi five* *grin*

When I watched it, I just kept “OMG… hot… hot… hot” from the start. *grin* Yeah, I must be dead if I just can’t be moved by Su’s expression, Chun’s lips, Jae’s abs, and also their moves and dance! I’m their keen fan and I’m (as usual) so biased in my opinion. So I sent this MV to my hubby and asked his opinion (and he grunted coz he had to spend his “precious” five minutes of his life to watch this *grin*)… and his comment is “Ehhh??? It’s odd! And where’s the girl? Where’s Kanye? And why it collapses?” and another certain comment of him about Chun that can make my ears turned red! Okay, when he’s back home from outta town… the first thing I wanna do is hitting or pinching him for making bad comment about my boys!!! Yeah, I often have arguments about the boys with him… coz I’m an avid fan while he’s not! Even when I showed him live performances of “LITI” and “Bolero”, and “Purple Line” for the cool dance, he only said “okay”! Just okayyyy?? Gosh, they’re amazing! *pout* He never praised the boys as far as I remember… always just “okay”. However, once I showed him Wonder Girl’s “Nobody”… his eyes just became as bright as summer sky… and he said “Cute!”. Dammit!!! When it comes to the gals with beautiful appearance… everything is just so perfect for him! *sigh* It’s the problem with the boys/men, eh? Maybe he’s just jealous and don’t wanna admit that the boys are waaaayyy hotter than him… way better in many things than him. Yet, I always bring my thoughts and excitement about my fandom in front of him (I hope that instead becomes tired of this… he’ll become a fan *cross my fingers*). As I do to few of my friends. I want to see how their opinions of the boys as non-fans, coz my opinions are always so biased… and maybe they just speak fairly? That when it’s good they will say it’s good and when it’s bad they will simply say it’s bad. And that’s what I need to balance my feeling towards the boys.

I always believe this saying… if we want to attract attention, don’t be a mediocre or make it as ordinary. Make it the most amazing or breathtaking one or just make it the ugliest or weirdest or just something bizarre… then you’ll get it! And maybe this one is kinda odd just like my hubby said (as a non-fan… and maybe many people will think the same as him)… so YAY… THE CURRENT MISSION IS COMPLETED coz they will get more attention because of this different kinda MV! For the time being, get as many attention as they can is the main mission… making the people get more curious about the boys is the next mission… then turning them into fans is the next mission!


Su is so damn good… so damn gorgeous… so damn sexy there! His dance… even his small moves… and his expression… are just perfect! I favorite many things about him in this “The Beginning” album! His song is my #1 fave… and now his appearance in this MV is also my #1 fave! But darling Su… though you “try” to tempt me with all the gorgeousness of you… I still can’t move my heart away from Jae (ehhh? When does he “try” to do that? I’m thinking too much, aren’t I?). My most fave scene is… mmmm I can’t make it in singular term… coz actually there ARE many fave scenes of him here! In the beginning when he’s just standing there and staring at certain spot… when he’s approaching the cam… when he’s flying on the sky with that cool black costume of his… when… okay, it will be a very long write, so I just say that all his scenes here is my most fave ones! You really made it, boy!
Aaaaahhhh, but there’s one feature that I don’t like on him… only one… it’s his white top he wears! Su, did Jiji ripped your clothes or was it the owner coz he just couldn’t let go off Jiji that wants to stay with you instead? Poor you, wearing that kinda rag clothes *got kicked* (okay, I’m not into fashion… so I just prefer the casual style more *grin*)

About Chun… I luv it when he shows his fierce face expression… especially in the opening part, and this is cool coz it somehow lessened the “beautiful lady” aura *grin*. Moreover when he shows us those “I’m cumming” expression when he’s in close up mode *grin* *got kicked*. Yeah… blame my pervy mind!
But *sigh*… well, I had said a couple of times on SYC that he reminds me of my lil auntie, and he really does except for his adam’s apple! The more I see him in this kinda appearance (wavy hair, being loosened or tied, and make up), my mind just flash directly to my auntie *grin* I’m not really so close to her and she lives far outta town, so I haven’t got a chance to show her this… and errrr, considering her “character” and her possible upcoming reaction maybe I shouldn’t show this to her *giggle* I pointed this out to my hubby instead (coz I need his opinion about the MV as well) and he laughed… but then I got that not so good comment from him “are you sure he’s not a transvestite?” Oh my, how I wanna hit him coz of this comment! He thinks this is funny… and maybe just wanna tease me… but this is not funny at all and I feel like %$($@#$% him! *sigh* Chun… I believe there are mooore people like this hubby of mine who will think bad of you… only because they don’t know this kinda appearance and theme is common in your country *sad*.

And about Jae… I luv the very beginning part, coz I luv his eyes *grin* But his hair doesn’t look good when he approached the camera on that beginning part… just so flat and doesn’t give a sensational effect. In this kinda theme I think that his hair should be like in “O” era. Gosh, I mentioned this too many times, eh? Since they released their cover album pic I’d already made comments that I want his “O” days hairstyle! With their current theme, it will look so damn good on him… so ethereal… so out of this world! Please Jae, not always that “Bieber Senior” style of hair… *grin* *got kicked*
And he looks gorgeous here… as always *grin*. Because there’s nothing new about him, so the words “as always” are always used! Maybe because he’s so damn gorgeous… the top of the gorgeous level… so he just can’t move higher, cost he’s already on the highest level, eh? *cough* Hey Jae, I just complimented you… but you don’t have to say thank to me… instead, a peck will do… *got kicked*
What I luv the most is his costumes here… especially the white one… coz when it flips I can see his abs… mmmmm *got kicked*. I always luv his clothes! He’s the one who rarely has the “wrong” costume. I wonder whether they themselves really the ones who made the decision about their clothes or they just will do anything their stylists say? From the clothes they wear when they rehearse or what they wear at their airports, I can see that Chun’s and Jae’s style are almost the same on and off stage… in a way. I can see that Jae likes a rather simple style… and Chun always with his unique style. So I guess that both of them choose clothes they wanna wear on stage. But when it comes to Su… think it’s different, so maybe he just trust his stylist more for the stage’s performance… and I must say that he should get a new stylist (well, this is my opinion… okay?). Jae almost never failed me in his outfit, on or off stage, and I luv… really luv his style!


And I so want the “Empty” can be made into a MV as well. I want this portray in a clean futuristic background… dominated in white and light blue-grey and silver. They are in a kinda space ship or just a big station. They stay in rooms with automatic doors and this kinda stuff. There will be the hall where they dance the choreography dance of the song. They wear white and silver “uniforms”, and sometimes on certain scenes they will also wear futuristic style glasses (I can picture the glasses myself but it’s difficult for me to put it in words *grin*). There’s also scene of shaking places (I luv the shaking thingy! Especially if it has to do with “bed” activities *cough* *got kicked*) and they run to get their way out. There’s also a girl… she’s keep coming around them in teleportation mode. Each one of them got annoyed with this girl and wants her to leave them alone coz her heart is empty… *grin* They tried to get away themselves or just wave her away but the girl kept appearing. Almost in the end, they point the girl with certain kind of remote/weapon they get from a glass box in the hall to make her go away… together they fight the girl… and it’s not easy coz of the shaking ground… yet then the vision of the teleporting girl becomes so blurry and when it’s fully gone there’s no more shaking happened. The boys then just gather in the middle of the hall and exchanging glances… their faces show that they’re being relieved. ^_^ That’s what I imagine! I know it sucks… but I can’t help myself imagining things! We can also interpret this girl as SM’s CEO who always bothering and annoying them and make their ground shaking, but they fight together against the girl and finally they can get him away! See? Not really bad, eh? *grin*

So… dear JYJ, PLEASE MAKE A MUSIC VIDEO FOR “EMPTY”… any theme will do!


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DBSK COUPLE… my opinion, my worry, my stupidity, my doing…


I’ve written this about a week ago, a couple of days after the hot discussion on SYC about the couple thingy… but I just put this on draft coz I planned to cite some of the fans’ comments too… then I got sick and this had to wait till I feel better.

Because of that hot discussion I had… I feel like writing about this matter. Yes, I’m absolutely aware that this matter is a veeeerrrrryy sensitive matter… even somehow I think that I should leave the idea behind and just keep my mouth shut. But my mouth has its own will this time *cough* so it just didn’t follow my order… so did my fingers on the keyboard! I just couldn’t help it! *grin* And the fact that this is my blog… this is the place where I can put all that’s on my mind (even the most personal one… if I want to), so I just continued what I wanted to do.


Through this post I will let out what’s on my mind or my own point of view upon this sensitive matter. I just wanna be honest not only to myself but to others to, so people will know where I stand on.

Through this post I also let you know how stupid I am on certain matters… how narrow-minded I am! *grin* For you who have already read my previous posts must know that I always call myself “to have limited brain cells”, “to easily get excited over things”, and “pathetically childish”… you’ll see why! *grin* Those are the sickness… the chronic ones that I still have to overcome up till now.

Through this post I also wanna say sorry if I offended you (and the other people in some ways… and thank to others who opened up my eyes. Sorry and thanks… (and luv you ^_^)

Through this post I also wanna make you think more about this matter and maybe you can help me grow *cough* (well, “old” people still need to grow also, eh?). Comments, even the harsh ones, are welcome. I just need it so I will have a broader view upon this matter.


Sometimes speak out can only make the damage…
But sometimes just keep in silence will not help either…
This time I chose to speak up… maybe there’s damage made, but with hope that it will help us to think more and decide what’s the best for all.


The discussions started with the posted pictures of the banners the Chinese fans showed in the venue of the Shanghai East Asia Flying Up Concerts. There are many couple banners, and some showed the lovey-dovey couple pics of the boys. Like these pics below.

In my case, at first I just think nothing else than my anxiousness about the boys. I was so occupied by the “easily get excited” and “stupid thoughts” of mine that I didn’t see it in wider perspective. This is my first comment:

“Ahh… this is what always bothering me! Maybe I should make a post about this couple thingy. I mean… for couples like soulmate and soulfighter, it’s just okay with me. But if the couples can be considered as “luvers”… well, though it’s fun for us to think about it… but HOW THEY THINK about this? They may get used to this… but aren’t they feel tired about this? I just hope that the fans not really so showy about this. Just keep those lovey-dovey (and even the most rated yaoi) stories for ourselves… just for the fans… but not for the boys… not in front of them…”

My comments seemed to be so biased and I somehow positioned myself as an anti Yunjae/Yoosu in general. I didn’t realize that time that by commented like this I’ve already made mistakes. What mistake? Just read my explanation below…

I thought that Yunjae and Yoosu (the most fave love-couples) will get awkward when they see the lovey-dovey pics of them shown in front of them… moreover in front of so many viewers, especially outside the fandom. I put myself as a believer that the boys are strictly straight. My mistake in here is that I did the worst thing ever, that is what I call PREJUDICE! I mean I don’t know even for a bit about the boys, so how would I know about their feelings? Once again I’m so leaded by my ASSUMPTION! And how bad it is if we just assuming on things, whatever the matter is, and thinking that what we think is just the right thing! So let’s see, how if the boys don’t even slightly mind about this love-couple thingy? Moreover, how if the boys are actually love-couples or gays that they don’t mind at all about this love-couple thingy? That they may even like it? So any comments I made against what Yunjae/Yoosu shippers said would be directly meant for the boys too! And they might get sad or even insulted with all the opinions or comments of the non Yunjae/Yoosu shippers gave. The worst is when they try find any ways to cover this “reality”… such as started dating gals, etc coz they know that many people in the society don’t like this “fact” and maybe they have to lie all their lives. THIS is what made me feel bad after that. But THIS is also what I’m so worried about… that is if what Tohosuki said was right:

By: tohosuki on October 23, 2010
at 11:38 pm

“wah such a chaos here..calm down guys..after i read all of your comment..what i can say that yes there are fanservice between all couple especially yunjae couple..
but im very sure here that the boys completely dont like it if their fans put that into gayness thing..
erm did you guys know that all the boys did have fb before(when they still in SM)..all of them have if except changmin..dont ask me how do i know this but i can confirm that it was them..but after they have been caught by their manager,all of them have to close their account..poor them..their manager are so straight..my cousin is one of jj mania..extremely mania..and she is one of the sibling that jj list her as his sibling in his fb account..jj really love and appreciate his fan..hoho lucky her..
what i want to share here is i can confirm that jj hate when his fan upload pic or video of him or more accurately yunjae gayness..he will immediately remove that person from his friend list and he also will block that person..jj even have said in his info account that he dont like when his fan spread fake or ridiculous news~~you know what i mean here..
erm i just what to say that please stop playing with jj pride..if you love him..stop hurting him please cassies..mature opinion here..sorry i did not mean to bash anyone here..but this is the true”

I luv the boys so much and I don’t wanna see them get hurt. Yet I don’t know anything about their feeling, right? Though I position myself as a believer that they will get hurt… but maybe they aren’t…

And the fact that this awkward situation will not only happened to this kind of relationship… thanks to what Akria said. The couple thingy can also do damage even if it concerns male-female relationship, such as Ayu-Jae gossips… coz someone will get hurt if this is not true. So it’s not just about the same sex relationship issues… any assumptions to any relationship can make the damage, though it will be in different aspect or even scale… based on the situation. Akria also said “you should try stopping the people who think it’s okay to joke about someones sexuality!!” Yet he/she want us to let the lovey-dovey yunjae fandom alone, let the shippers continuing their fun and fantasy… coz it’s been there for a long time and become part of the fandom. Mmmmm… I still wonder till now… who started this lovey-dovey fandom? Fans… or the boys themselves? *curious… curious*

I’m damn worried about the trio gets to international market. And so afraid that they could be ruined by the image made by the Yunjae/Yoosu shippers. Whether the boys mind or don’t mind about fans make this love-couple thingy, still somehow I’m afraid that they will get bashed by other narrow-minded people who is also so occupied by their prejudice of the gay issue if this kinda people manage to see those Yunjae/Yoosu stuffs made by the fans. In my place… my country, this issue is a sensitive even it’s a taboo… and things like this can really ruin someone’s image. And I let myself to think as this people think and just driven by the “norms” accepted here. I became so narrow-minded and so lack of confidence upon this matter. I actually just don’t want their image gets ruined coz it’s hard for me to see them have to suffer another hardship. Pheonixia put what I thought in better words (ah, yeah this limited brain cells of mine *sigh* Thanks to her)

By: pheonixia on October 23, 2010
at 10:41 pm

“Wow first of all calm down please. I was raised up in the “west” as well so I will try to explain the situation. The girls above are saying that they have NO PROBLEM with Yunjae…..but don’t shove it infront of the boys (aka the “kissing” and many “hugging” pics; the other ones are okay (I guess))
Also, is it insensitive, dirty, etc.? YES IT IS! It is insensitive to the boys because they consider each other brothers, not lovers who kiss each other and more in fanfics and on POSTERS. If you watch ABDBSK3 during Jae’s and Yunho’s part they explicitly state not to go to crazy with this thing. It is also insensitive because even if it wasn’t two guys kissing or being “flirty” etc. then do you think they would still want those kind of pictures up? It is like for Jaeri shippers or JaexAyu shippers etc. It would be the same thing if posters of Jae and Ayu were shown kissing in public, etc. It is dirty because of the fact that their are pics of them kissing and other things that are BLOWN UP. It doesn’t matter if it is a guy or a girl that they are kissing.
But, imagine this scenario. You become a part of a girl group that rises to fame. You truly love your members like they are your actual sisters. But, one thing leads to another and then you are paired with one of your bandmates and “shipped” as a lesbian. Every concert you go to there are pictures of the two of you “kissing” and being pro-les. Now, you have nothing against lesbians yourself…..but you are ashamed of being labelled as one……..(this scenario is of course only in the case if you are not lesbian…)
I agree with your point that people should not make fun of sexuality in general. But, again supporting people blowing up posters of Yunjae kissing is not going to solve this problem. It’s just going to get the boys bashed. If you think about it another way………………
if American’s do find out about this and consider it to be real…….then Jae may HAVE TO start publicizing that he is dating so and so girl to stop the anti’s from beating him down. He may even have to have a speed-marriage…..
Which the Yunjae fans/shippers would HATE even more probably cause this fandom is half insane.
It’s a sad fact but homophobia is HUGE in America and the majority of the world. Even in Korea. Have you watched ‘You’re Beautiful’? Did you know that mothers of Koreans boys posted an ad in a newspapaer stating that ‘If our boys turn gay and then get AIDs we are holding this drama responsible’……there was a huge fuss over it.
SO don’t bash the above girls. And don’t bash Yunjae fans. We are just saying……….”Go ahead be Yunjae crazy or any other pairing but make it not sexual if it can be helped (as in the youtube videos and posters).
If you are wondering……..I don’t support the act of being homosexual BUT if faced with a homosexual person I will not hate him/her. I would treat them with the respect and dignity that they deserve like the rest of us human beings. Neither would I bash this person. I may even be extra nice to them to make up for all the morons in this world.”

I’m not so against this couple thingy. I have pics of these couples, quite many of them… especially the animated ones. But because of these pics I have, I had unpleasant experience… and not just once! Even my hubby was acted as a narrow-minded people for few times *sigh*. I commented this (through the Yunjae vid post):

“The couple thingy is fun tho… but not too much, please?
Or keep it only for cassies, not so openly to others?
I had experience about people (tho only few) who after see the pics in my PC gave “bad” comments about the boys! And I didn’t like them being harassed/insulted by people! It’s no fun at all… even sad to hear it! And I don’t want that to happen again! That’s why I feel it this way… that’s why I hope at least this kinda thing could be minimized. That’s all…”

Yeah… though I explained to my friend who’s not a TVXQ fan (none of my friends in real world is TVXQ fans *sad*) that this kinda thing is “normal” in this fandom and just for fun… the answer I got from a friend of mine is “what a funny way to show your luv by doing this kinda “fun” things on them” This comment of my friend still imprinted in my heart till now. I just didn’t realize then… coz that time I just think nothing but enjoy the fandom. This comment of hers really hurt me… yet this is also the reason why I’m against any love-couple thingy stuffs outside the fandom! Coz somehow the non-fans will find it hard to understand *sigh*.

Yet, about the ruined image, I forgot other things. I kinda believe that this Yunjae/Yoosu couple thingy can add bias assumption and prejudice to those narrow-minded people’s thinking… especially about their sex lives, but other aspects are also to be considered. Such as their style and image they use in their album. The photobook has the cool concept, but not for the (album) cover, not for certain showcase style and make-ups, not for certain promotional vid. For us, the Asian music luvers who get used to this, maybe will not mind at all about the style and make-ups… but what about the western people? Will the boys get succeed if they use this image? *sigh* So the image made by Yunjae/Yoosu shippers could become an aspect, but it’s NOT THE ONLY aspect that could be considered by those narrow-minded new listeners. We must put most concern upon their Engrish tho! *grin* And by thinking about their ruin-able image like this, I made another mistake of mine… that is the fact that somehow I didn’t believe in the way they do! And to think that ALL the new listeners are narrow-mindedly and will only see things from the image without considering listening to the songs and give them chance… is my another mistake! So then I changed my way of thinking upon this matter, so whatever image has given by them I must see this only as ways to get more attention. That’s all.

I just have to keep my mind on positive ways. Though it’s darn very hard for me to think this way. Be positive! (why there’s still the doubt?) BE POSITIVE! (can I just be in zero instead? No positive no negative… better to think nothing with this “limited brain cells of mine” *sigh* I’m trying though… I said before (on my previous posts) to not immerse so much with this fandom or else I got tired… but this fandom just have tight grip on me… I got attached on them without being able to fully escape from it. Well, it’s coz I myself just don’t wanna fully escape from this… too much love involves…


I wanna say sorry for the people who feel offended by me… even I wanna say sorry to the boys if somehow what I thought and said might offend them in any ways. I thought it’s for the sake of the boys (and somehow I still think it is… yeah what a hard headed person is me! *grin*) but I should have put more considerations upon this matter before I said my POV and carefully state the words.

I also wanna say thanks to the people who have the same thoughts as me and also who against my opinion. They had opened my eyes so I could leave this narrow-minded nest where I usually live in and view things in wider perspective. Still I have to think and use my brain more, coz I feel there are a lot of things that I haven’t considered of yet.


Somehow I think that THE DAMAGE HAS BEEN DONE…
The damage is done by Yunjae/Yoosu (or other love-couple) shippers by making so many explicit love-couple image of the boys IF in fact the boys are against this image… moreover if their sexual preference is straight, coz of course it will be a kinda “insult” for them
The damage is done by the anti Yunjae/Yoosu (or other love-couple) shippers by making opinion against the love-couple thingy IF in fact the boys are okay or even amused/happy with the image… moreover if they are gays coz of course it will be also a kinda “insult” for them
The damage is done by Yunjae/Yoosu (or other love-couples) shippers AND the antis by too much showing off their opinions about their beliefs IF in fact the boys are bi coz they will feel awkward themselves upon this matter
And all the damage incurred only because WE DON’T KNOW ANYTHING yet we make ASSUMPTIONS and be occupied by our PREJUDICE upon them
Let’s just only believe in THE CLEARLY STATED FACTS only, and stop ASSUMING THINGS upon matters we don’t surely know about…
Always Keep the Peace…


This is my last comment in the SYC discussion:

“I don’t know what else to say…
It’s kinda makes me tired!
And I don’t want to explain the same statements again and again… so thanks a lot for your comment!
No one know for sure though about the real them…
And everyone has different POV…
And I think I must consider all of this views… coz maybe it can hurts other ppl feelings too
If they don’t agree with what I say… let them be
At least I spoke out this other POV of mine and let them consider more about this matter…
Still I believe what I believe… and others may believe what they believe…
So let it be…
Just hope that what we’re doing and believe will not hurt the boys’ feeling…
That’s all.”


Jae says through his tattoo…

Deferto neminem…
Accuse no man…

Can it be interpreted as “don’t make assumptions”? If so… then let’s not…
Though I won’t make any assumption about the boys but… errr… *cough* it will be hard not to make ones about their entertainment companies *cough*
Gosh… I should be straight up my mind about this and be consistent *grin*


I feel thankful when I got discussions like I had because sometimes I don’t see some matters from others’ perspectives and my minds are fully occupied with the way I think that I believe it’s the right thing… though apparently I could be totally wrong.
When people speak out more of their feeling and their point of view… we can learn something from there. We don’t always agree to what others say and there’s no obligation that we have to make ourselves agree with them then. We just have to keep our mind open to the ideas. Whether it’s negative comment or positive comment against our point of views, all can be considered as “positive” feedbacks in the term that we can get some other consideration upon the issue. We sometimes miss certain factors in our way of thinking and others’ point of view can open up our eyes and make us think more about the issue. So we shall respect others’ POV. And by doing this maybe we are able to position ourselves in the best possible way. And we are able to make our next moves. And the most important thing is we can avoid any more damage, or if it’s already there we can find ways to fix it.
That’s all folks…


Posted in My Fandom - Tohoshinki/DBSK/TVXQ | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

JYJ twitter … & … JAEJOONG’s tattoo


This is what I also wanna write/comment about, but I’d already felt tired yesterday…

(The previous post is here)


The latest tweets of JYJ

JYJ made me did something what my hubby called as “ridiculous”. Why? They made me opened a twitter account only to follow them while I know nothing what they write about! He asked me how could I understand the words? I told him I got the translation from the fan sites. So, why should open an account while in the end I just have to visit the fan sites to get their saying? Well… maybe I will tweet them… say something to them… He chuckled, “What? To tell your Jejung that you wanna marry him?” I said, “Why not? You did say that you don’t mind at all about this dream of mine, eh?” *grin* (He knows really well about my fandom and my dream about that young man name Jaejoong. I told him casually that I want Jae to be my hubby and asked him whether he would mind or not. He said that I should go on… he didn’t mind at all! Well, of course he didn’t mind at all coz the possibility is only 0,00000001% that Jae will be my hubby! It will be different if I mentioned my colleague instead *grin*) He then said that’s impossible and I amusingly said, “Anything is possible. We always believe this saying, eh? And now the possibility is higher for me cause of twitter. Who knows… maybe we’ll get close, somehow?” And he kept “impossible”-ing… and I kept teasing him *giggle* Oh… how I luv twitter! LOL

I’m really glad that the boys opened a twitter (or if they have their own fb account, or blog, or micro blog, or anything) coz we can feel closer to them. We can see that the cuteness is real (it’s you Su…), we can see that the melancholy Casanova is real (who else if it’s not you, Chunnie hunnie?), we can see that the unique shopaholic narcissist camwhore dork is real (I don’t have to point out who, eh? *got kicked*). We can see the interactions between them… and laugh and smile and feel sad and feel many other emotions along with their words and pics only. Out of the three of them, I found that Jae’s is the most amusing one. Not because he’s my #1 bias… but becoz he’s so random… predictable yet unpredictable. I kinda know that he’s such a shopaholic, and it’s predictable that he’ll do shopping often (and because he’s kinda a narcissist *cough* then he will tell us about that shopping thing *grin*)… but I always think that it only has something to do with clothes and accessories… not those unique household items! I can see that he’s such a dork… but his dorkiness is somehow unpredictable… just like what he did to Jiji… made Jiji to “exercise” using the treadmill coz he thought that Jiji is overweight! Whattt??? LOL! He’s such a stupid fool… yet so funny and so genuine… and makes me luv him more and more and more! (*cough* I feel like teasing my hubby again… *giggle*)

Maybe I should start tweeting them… tell them that I’ll support them, wish them good luck on every shows they have, tell them not to forget to take care more of their health, tell them that I wanna see more manly side of them *cough*, tell them some English words to learn (errr… coz of this pervy mind of mine, maybe they will learn more pervy words… so it’s not a good idea! But somehow I feel that they will eagerly learn this… *grin*), and… maybe ask Jae to marry me??? *wink* Errr… where’s my hubby??? He must see this! *giggle*


Jae’s tattoo

He looks sexy with tattoo… and I luv it! But… too much of them will not look sexy anymore, especially when he’s old like me *cough* (*grin* well, I’m a “granny”… remember? *wink*). I just picture him as an old grandpa wearing swimming trunks and his back is full of “wrinkled” tattoos *grin* *got kicked* Hey, that’s only what I think! And I think that’s not sexy at all! Errrr… though, of course no grandpa is sexy enough… whether he has tattoo or not. *grin* But… nevertheless it’s his body and he has full rights to do things on it, as long as he feels happy then let him be. And I don’t see this as “torturing” himself! If he cuts his flesh or likes being whipped (*cough* why this thing makes me imagining too much?)… then this what I call torturing his body and himself and this kinda actions that I will fully go against… I will say directly to him that he shouldn’t do such things (coz I luv him) and ask him to find a help. But tattooing is something artistic and something sooo personal, so I will not fuss again this matter. Let him tattoo his body… let him doing things what he likes or makes him happy… and this is what I believe.

What amused me the most is what he tattooed there… the Micky and Junsu names! And when I saw the comments are already 200+, I’ve already smell that “why only YooSu names” complaints. And yeah, I can see that still there are so many fans feeling sad over this fact. Oh c’mon… he must have his own reason why only two names there… reasons that nobody but him knows very well. If he thinks that it should be only those names for now… let it be! Why so fussed about this? That it will widen the gap between HoMin and JYJ? Oh my… about the gap, do we really know for sure how big the gap is now? Maybe the gap is already wide from the start, or maybe the gap is still as close as before, or maybe there’s no gap in their feelings and relationship but it’s just not written because of the current situation… who knows? Just stop complaining and enjoy his tattoo… and his back… and his position… *yummy yummy*

Personally, I’m not so into people’s name being tattooed on someone’s body. Coz feelings may change (though I hope his feelings for Chun & Su will not!)… so it will be awkward if he no longer has strong feeling for his best friends here. But, maybe in the future there will be a tattoo removing process that’s not hurt at all… so it’s easy for him to remove any tattoos he’s no longer likes. Or maybe because he’s waiting for the pains to come when he gets his tattoos removed? The “M” type of him? *grin* *got kicked veeeery hard* Ahhh… let’s hope that he won’t have to erase that… and that he will keep it as part of his life… until he becomes a grandpa. Then his grandkids will ask what’s the meaning of the tattoo… and he will tell them “They are the best buddies/brothers I’ve ever had in my entire life… the ones I luv and respect so much besides your granny (T/N: this would be me *cough*… I’m a “granny”, remember?) and your mom and dad… and you all too” What a precious memory…


That’s all for now folks…

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